Monday, March 30, 2009

Surprise!!!!

surprise!!!! -thats good for today's post title... well, today was Monday.. and i hate dislike Monday!... i dont hate dislike  the day.. but i hate dislike what im going to do.. and yes it school. my school life was suck... thats why i tell my mamma that im lazy to go to school today... -no answer-... and then i get to iron my uniform -cuz im suck to do it before i sleep!!- after i do that stuff -that i hate dislike- my stomach was super aching like someone just set a fire in my stomach... so i get back to my bed -without saying anything to my mamma/anyone!!-.. my chemist teacher -mad- face was flash in my head while im struggling to death on that time... then i remember... theres no chemist today..... hahaha...... i get to sleep after that stupid thought.... and no school today!..
well there is something that bother me now... the class should get their new schedule already today and theres no message or call from my friend.. and my 2nd topics history note was still empty... oh no im going to die..... wish me a good luck please....

Saturday, March 28, 2009

I'm Just One Person

8.15 pm... my house already dark with only one candle that light.. we supposed to switch our light off at 8.30 pm until 9.30 pm but my dad quicken the start hour and extended it...our neighborhood was also do their part, ohh look theres a bright light from our neighbor....... "off offf... turn it offf" "cant do that pal.. we were fixing our car" -what cant you do that other time!!! our light turn on at 8.40 pm

"burst"

i dont know how to start this... i was not a good friend i thought.. i dont know my friends well enough and just enough for me to trust them... or they cant trust me cuz i wont let them see trough me.. see my own self or they dont even want to be my friend. thats what i thought.. but i cant never get the right answer if everyone keep everything in them!!... i need to hear something, i need to know something. then i can start to trust...trust.... it was really scary to trust a person.. it was my most fear...trusting someone... i was too scare if they betray me nor i did... its hard... i dont like to alone in everything... i cant see a light of trust in their eyes when they speak to me.. nor did they look my eyes...

i barely remember my first what called friend.. she was nice.. i think.. even thought our religion was different.. we make a good friend.. and i do trust her that time.. but then i dont know whats went wrong she just disappear in my life.. her goodbye didnt even reach my ear.. and its break my heart... i left alone... then i meet this girl... a tough girl... we were best friend.. but with her syndrome i cant talk about all my problems that hit me..hard.... but thats okay cuz she wa soo nice that i could forget my problems... then she have to move.. her father jobs made her go away from me and i again left alone.... sadness... i wish that i just burst into tear that day.. but no.. my head wont let me.. cuz i know it wasnt her fault.. even theres no farewell...

my heart that was already pale, slowly turn black... but before it did i a new friend... she was a smart, nice, and hyper girl... she was popular in school and she was an athlete.. shes the one who befriend me.. and i.. its surprising that i could accept her that time... and she was nice.. i dont know.. my heart just want to to trust this new person.. so easy... her eyes was so... bright... i could see those trust and the look of friendship that i could never see again... then she meet new friend that i think deserve her than i am... they was happy... and i told my heart to let go of her... and this time i left them together.. while me... it was a mistake.. i should never do such thing... it was my regret.. i should have be with them all the way... i screwed up.... i thought they will be a very good friend without me.. but im wrong....im sorry... i wish i could say it... i wish those word could reach them...

and now.. i was confuse... i dont know who was my friend... i think she could.. but my words cant reach her.. she cant see me, cuz she.. i think.. only want to be seen herself.... im sorry... i couldnt see you too... you always keep everything from me, like i always keep something from you.... i just ... i was too scare to be alone... friends always left me cuz they didnt see all of me..or they dont care about me and my feelings... look what you did now.. this drop of tear......... it will eventually dried and disappearing.... thats why no one can see me with bare eyes...

Friday, March 27, 2009

the title woulde be.... elective subject!!!!!

and yeah, im having a super boring life this year.. im totally have no good thing to do right now.... so what im going to write now??? politics?breaking news? or ??... that was not such a good thing for me to write cuz it would just makes my head spin like a flying UFO...

okay now i have something in mind... lets write about my study... i now in the class 4G taking the elective subject whichs is Chemistry, Physics, Additional Math, English for Science and Technology and Engineering Drawing...

# okay start with chemistry... this subject did interest me little but i hate homework and i have no choice than to do it [or copy paste it from my dear friend] or i failed.. thats the teacher said!! miraculously i didn't - for the March test...

# go to physic[s] ... well.. the teacher don't really gets to know how to teach us... he gave us notes -or tell us to read the text book - and we just have to memorize it to passed... as i predicted i failed -most of my classmate did- ... well of course i did .. i don't like reading and memorizing, or notes??? no....

# additional math -add math for short- goes the same but this time the teacher little more stricken than before.... but there is one attitude i don't... i mean -super duper dislike in him.....

# next the english for science and technology [est]......... i hate dislike it... the answer scheme was too strict and i have to write an essay about [?]?? "hey!, can i drop this subject??" i really don't get this subject

# the last elective subject was engineering drawing.. this class only do drawing and that's mean i have to memorize every steps on how to draw everything???? this subject get my head spin if i do the drawing without my text book... and its true cuz i nearly failed my march test -this was a miracle cuz i thought i failed thankfully i don't burst into tear when i get my paper back......

okay im tired now.... good day....
ath

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Monday, March 23, 2009

I'M ALIVE!!

I am now revived! hahaha! it's been more than 7 month I died, leaving this pity blog of mine and in that time too I'm dying cuz my stupid internet line wont work well. i'm so happy to get back online! After stuck up on trouble with too many virus, bad connection and broken monitor, i SURVIVED.. i could go to the cybercafe in the city, but i wont... cuz it feel uncomfortable and empty...[???]...
so good day and good bye!
ath

Thursday, March 19, 2009

new classmates

my new classmates..
all image was taken from kjEm's maStErpIEce blogspot

 
  
  
  

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